Letting go of past relationships and moving on can be challenging, and realizing it’s time to let go of a past relationship can bring on a lot of emotions. Even though it can be tempting to ignore our feelings or avoid taking action and ending the relationship, it is healthier to feel and process our emotions and make space for healthy relationships in our lives.
‘How to Let Go of Past Relationships and Move On’ graphic by Kenise, ATSO
This mental health coping list was specifically requested by one of our followers, and we are always happy to help in any way we can!
So here are our 11 favorite healthy ways to let go of past relationships and move on:
1. Remind yourself that “If you keep finding yourself chasing after someone, it means they are running away”.
Reminder graphic by Kenise, ATSO
Healthy love is reciprocated love. If you find yourself constantly chasing after someone and putting all of the effort into the relationship, take this as a sign that this is probably not the relationship for you. Letting go of relationships in this scenario not only helps you make space for healthier relationships that will respect and care for you but also helps you practice self-love. Your time, energy, and presence are valuable, and people should feel lucky to spend time with you. If that’s not the case, it’s a sign it’s time to let go of this relationship.
2. Use this time to practice self-care and connect with yourself.
Practice doing more self-care and investing time in yourself graphic by Kenise, ATSO
One of the most important relationships you will ever have is with yourself and taking time to be with yourself is part of a healthy lifestyle. Treat yourself like you would a loved one, because you deserve to love yourself! Self-love is like a muscle, so the more you practice self-love, self-care, and self-appreciation, the stronger your self-love muscle will become.
Taking time to sit with your thoughts and connect with yourself is also a great way to understand your needs and wants better. All around, it’s a win.
3. Try talking to and connecting with new people; see what else is out there!
Photo of people talking by Antenna via Unsplash
There are so many people on this planet, and with social media and the internet, it is easier than ever to find new friendships, relationships, and communities both online and near you. If you want to connect with people with similar interests, look for groups focused on activities you like, like hiking, reading, spending time with dogs, baseball, gaming, or anything else! Facebook and Eventbrite can be really helpful for finding groups and events near you.
4. Remember that what is meant for you will find you, and to make way for the future you have to leave the past in the past.
What is meant for you will find you graphic by Kenise, ATSO
What you’re looking for is looking for you too, and the future has so many good surprises and healthy new relationships waiting for you! It’s okay to leave relationships in the past if needed, and by leaving them in the past, you are that much closer to embracing a healthy, new, and more fulfilling relationship.
5. Choose a personal goal or new skill you want to attain or learn in your free time.
Photo of travel journey by That’s Her Business via Unsplash
Letting go of relationships tends to give us some time back, and spending some of this extra time with yourself can be very helpful. By spending more time with yourself you will also gain a better idea of what it is that makes you happy and what you are looking for out of life. This is especially helpful if you tend to fixate on past relationships and want to focus on something new.
6. Write down the qualities of who you want to be with to remind yourself that you deserve the best.
List of qualities graphic by Kenise, ATSO
It’s easier to find what you’re looking for if you know what you want and don’t want. Write down all the qualities of who you want to be with and then narrow this list down to the top six to ten things you are looking for in your ideal relationship. Feel free to check against this list whenever you’re trying to decide whether or not this is the right relationship for you.
This is especially helpful if you tend to put the person you’re in a relationship with on a pedestal and/or are someone who always tries to make a relationship work.
7. Celebrate yourself more!
Photo of a woman celebrating by Clay Banks via Unsplash
You are amazing and you deserve to celebrate yourself! Unhealthy relationships can leave us feeling unsure of ourselves and leave us with diminished self-worth. A good way to rebuild confidence is to celebrate yourself. Celebrate your big and little wins, leave yourself little presents when you can, and do more things that help you feel authentically you. You deserve it!
8. Reconnect to a past hobby to reconnect to yourself.
Image of woman painting tree and cliff by Jade Stephens via Unsplash
Unhealthy relationships can make us feel disconnected from our authentic selves, and part of healing and moving on from past relationships is taking time to reconnect with our authentic selves. If you don’t have a go-to hobby, this is a great time to try out some new things and see what makes you happy!
9. Remove anything they gave you from your space and put it out of sight. Better yet, donate it if possible!
Photo of a box of donations by Annie Spratt via Unsplash
Our environments can directly influence us, and if you have a lot of physical reminders lying around of someone you are trying to move on from, it’s time to get rid of those items. Feel free to do this in stages if you need to, but if you’re struggling to move on, this could be part of the reason why. Donate and recycle what you can and throw out the rest!
10. Get rid of pictures of them and delete old conversation threads with them. Delete their number and unadd them on socials too if you’d like.
Unfollow and delete old conversations graphic by Kenise, ATSO
We spend so much time on our devices so it’s important to cleanse your phone now and then. Not only does this improve your phone’s performance and give you back storage space, but it takes these visual reminders out of sight and out of mind. This is an important step in letting go of a past relationship and moving on especially if you tend to reminisce by re-reading and looking at old conversations and photos.
11. Remind yourself that you deserve fulfilling love that makes you feel happy, safe, and respected. Allow yourself time to heal at your own pace.
You deserve fulfilling love graphic by Kenise, ATSO
Holding onto past relationships can keep us from enjoying our lives, living in the present moment, and finding fulfilling relationships in the future. Letting go of past relationships can be tough and bittersweet, but it is part of life and part of growing. Heal at your own pace and celebrate all the steps you take, big and small.
You deserve healthy love in all forms, and by letting go of past relationships we make space for healthier and happier ones. Thank you for reading!
Always yours,
Sara, ATSO
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